At the movie showing at a local church, many parents seated around me kept shaking their heads, muttering "is that really true?". I wanted to turn around and tell them, "Hi I'm Megan. I'm a high school senior. This movie describes my life."
The pressure, the stress, the burnout; it's all true.
From the time I was in elementary school, I learned to get 100% on everything. I was a 4.0 student in middle school. My mom would never put the 'Proud parent of an honor roll student' bumper stickers on her car because she did not think that was moral. Yet, she did not push me to excel. Of course my parents wanted me to do my best, but it was never a requirement. Unlike my friends' parents, they never paid me for good grades (every A is $20, every B is $10). I had to be motivated on my own accord.
In high school, I jumped right in to the swing of things, taking all the recommended courses the school suggested. Passed an incredibly hard test and essay to be placed in Honors English all the way around. I took Biology and Geometry as a freshmen. As a sophomore, I took Chemistry- a class my mom did not take until she was in college.
Junior Year, I screwed myself. I took Honors English, Anatomy and Physiology (the teacher said it should be an AP class), Pre-Calculus, AP US History and AP Psychology. In addition, I was on a competitive dance team; six dance classes over the course of three days a week, plus weekend competitions and conventions. I was confirmed into the Catholic church that year as well- I had to go to mandatory 2-hour meetings every Monday night.
The homework load was insane. I would work until dinner, sometimes even trying to do it during dinner (my parents nixed that idea). Then come back up and work some more. I'd go to bed around 11:30 or 12, only to get up at 6:30 and do some more. I fell asleep most nights worrying about what I still have to do in the morning, or go over study questions in my head for my test the next day. I would start delegating my homework assignments; which ones I needed to do at home, and which ones I could do the day it was due during my American Sign Language class. I perfected the art of BS-ing homework. (It is indeed an art).
This is when I started drinking coffee. Not every day, maybe once a week; on those super long Monday mornings. I was still 16. Most mornings, all I wanted to do was sleep. It's very likely that I took one or two "sick" days that year to catch up on sleep and homework. At the same time, however, I hated missing school because it was so hard. I'd have a cold, or even a flu, but I'd have to suck it up and go to school because my teachers would be upset if I missed the lecture, and it was too risky to take someone else's notes.
I've carried my textbooks around with me to school. I've looked over the vocab words for a test for the first time during passing period. I've asked kids in earlier period what is on my test the following period.
My parents were weary of me taking AP classes. They don't believe in them. But at the same time, colleges LOVE them. Given, my favorite class in high school was AP US History, but it didn't almost kill me at the same time. I made over 200 flashcards and spend over 30 hours at review sessions and groups for the AP test. And that was all just in the two-and-a-half months before the May test. By the time I graduate, my transcript will read 4 AP Classes. At most schools, that's incredible. But colleges will see it and go, "She only took 4 and her school offers 16? That's a slacker..."
During the movie, a psychologist or doctor says that teens need 9-12 hours of sleep. My friends and I literally laughed out loud. 6 hours is a GOOD night for us.
I cannot tell you how many times I told people last year, "I'm sorry, I can't hang out with you tomorrow" or "Sorry, I really wish I could babysit", but "I can't because I have so much homework to do".
There was a girl in the movie, a 4.0 seventh grader, who committed suicide after receiving a B in a math class. I was shocked. Then I reprimanded myself. How many tears have I shed after having a C+ in AP Economics for a single quarter?
By the time you get to Senior Year, you are simply exhausted. Senioritis is as real as can be. Some kids claim they've had it since freshmen year, but it only kicked in for me last month. I had 14 college applications to fill out, an AP Econ test to study for (of which I could not comprehend the material), and an English essay to write, amongst others. I had absolutely no motivation to do any of it. All that sounded good was to roll up in bed and sleep. My alarm goes off at 6:15 this year. Most days, I hit snooze and sleep until 7. School is the last thing on my mind. I have no idea how we're going to survive college if we are burnt out already.
We go to school for seven hours a day, listening to lecture after lecture, and being assigned homework by teachers who think their class is the only important one in our lives. In college, we will only have-what, like 3? 4?- classes PER WEEK. We won't have to take calculus or AP Government at 8am if we don't want to. It could be at 4pm if we choose. We will have time to see friends, to do homework, to study on our own time. We won't be sitting in a classroom all day long. So what is high school preparing us for if college is nothing like it?
We are going nowhere. We indeed, are on a Race to Nowhere.
